Act III

In which I procrastinate, no one is harmed, but everyone is seriously frightened.

I'm trying to think of a first chapter in an original novel which is due today.
..It's not working.

So my second defense is procrastination! (Guaranteed to not be full proof)
Did you know they have  a Russian Sherlock Holmes? Yes, it's in a different language, no I do not understand what they are saying and it scares me to death when they are chattering away and then Holmes bursts into hysterical laughter.
But it's Russian!

Instead of posting the video on here, (I didn't even watch all of it.)  I will give you my interpretation of what a Russian Sherlock Holmes would be like.

1. They would all speak in really bad accents. "Vatson, do ve havve a caaase todaay?"
2. Really, really bad accents.   "No, Hooolmes. But ve do havve a murrrderr."
...Maybe I'll quit while I'm ahead. Holmes sounds like the Godfather.

"Vatson! De case has beeen solved! Dis girl suffers from meeental problmes. Da, very bad. Ve vill leave her now."

*Sigh* Back to writing.

Great. Now all I hear is dis liiitle voice...

In My Absence....

I've felt missed.

Truly and deeply.

I was even sent an e-card with a frightening puppy panting like it was having a heart attack to welcome me back.*

Where have I been?
Well, lots of places.
In the sun, where I went fossil hunting and found a pile of discarded drug needles instead.
In a blizzard and nearly a car accident.
In the car in a canyon in the rain with a picnic.
In a 3-D movie, where I missed the first five minutes and all the previews.

And..
Wait for it.
No, I'm not going to say in loooovveee. Like you are all expecting me to.
Well, sort of.
If falling in love with a book character for the umpteenth time counts as love.
But I don't think so.

I tried!! I honestly wasn't going to talk about this book until I was finished with the series! I was even trying to keep this post Sherlock Holmes free!!
..epic fail with that.

I love these books.
You should all read these books.
That's all.
I won't rant and go all literary freak on you about how wonderful their word usage was. How this is totally awesome and that I count it as a continuation of the original canon and 100% buy into the Conan Doyle theory they mention.
I'm not going to tell you that.
Nor, am I going to let my girl side kick in and shout from the housetops about how utterly adorable Sherlock Holmes was. And how I nearly died when he...
oh wait.
I'm not telling you.

*evil grin*
I guess you'll just have to read it yourself to find out.




*Haha! Just kidding about the card, Percival.
It rocked.

Delaying The Inevitable

I get to speak in front of people tonight.
For those of you who know me, you'll realize just what a big deal that is.

I'm talking glossophobia 100%   I fit all the symptoms. Yay. I have a phobia to go along with all my weirdness.

So what do I do when I'm nervous about talking in front of people? Do I go over and write and rewrite my talk? Do I memorize everything I'm going to say?

Nope.

I procrastinate.

And it probably didn't help that I was extremely bored. So while I am counting down the awful hours, I have some YouTube videos that I've been watching to take my mind off the deplorable event this evening.


We are all aware of my Sherlock Holmes obsession. The one that beats my Star Trek obsession into the ground.  So these videos should not be surprising to you in anyway. No, this is not Wassup Holmes again, even though that has to be my favorite YouTube video of all time, these are just random little videos.. that well, my Holmesaholic self finds hilarious.

And I can also blame my amusement on my nerves and the fact that when I found these, I had eaten five chocolate chip cookies.

Oh, and my only explanation for Watson is that my Watson is much better. (Go Jude Law!) so just excuse the teddy bear looking man.  Lemon Tree

Since you are probably all bored/appalled after that one, I won't make you watch my other favorite one unless you really want to. And if you do, it's right here.

And for those of you who have sat through all of this, a more amusing one just for you. Sherlock Holmes and The Safety Dance. You know that as much as your not-nerdy self is rebelling, you really want to watch.
Go ahead. It's right here. And all I have to say for this. 0.5 EPIC WIN! 0.39 LOL!

I think I need to renew these episodes from the library, they look awesome.

I think I need help.

Help.

Writing Woes

                              (Lost the link thing. Deviantart.)


Help me.

In this particular picture you see above, I am feeling like Watson. Well... I always feel like a Watson, but that's just because it's a nickname.  Do  you see the resentful glare? The folded arms, the look of simmering anger? Well take a good look, folks 'cause that mood is changing and now I am going to play Holmes AND START SMACKING HEADS WITH THE RIDING CROP!

Got it?

Do you want to know how we got to this point? Of course you do, I'm the one holding the whip so you get to hear it if you want to or not.

I did school, I had a marvelous day, ate about... four cookies (and counting) and understood my Latin lessons. I was good! I was a diligent student!!  I wanted time to write this evening, I have formulating plans of brilliance that I will lose unless I get it written down!!!
So I wrote one tiny, little story. I was listening to classical music and all calm, feeling creative...

And then my sister and her little friend came in, turned on obnoxious music, started playing some brainwashing child's game and were screaming:
1. At the dog
2. At each other
3. At me

GONE IS THE PEACEFUL, HAPPY CLASSICAL MUSIC (Welcome, Fatboy Slim) and hello to writer's dilemma.

I just want to write a story!! Is that so difficult to ask!!?!?!

..... *Evil light bulb*

"Oh, children!!!- *big fake smile*- "Would you like some candy? Some chocolate? Some SUCKERS!??

"Go fetch, little ones! Go get it! It's out there! No, over there.. by the mud pit, no, no. You've seen The Princess Bride haven't you? It looks like the ones they have in the fire swamp? Yes, that one."

Wassup?

Holmes, (You know who you are)  This is for you.  I LOVE this video. It's going on my favorites list. Love, love, love, LOVE it! I can't stop laughing.  Even now it's making me giggle. I think you'll be able to tell why I found it so hilarious.
....  When you come to the drunkwalk, try and keep any and all flashbacks out of your mind.
Oh and please, everyone, when addressing me with my alternate identity, I ask you say it like they do in the video: WATSUN!